The Thursday Tradition|Christmas 2009

Well, after surviving a 5 A.M.-1 P.M. Monday shift, 12-8 P.M. and Kids Night on Tuesday, OPENING yesterday, and still half-asleep after my 5 A.M.-1 P.M. today, I am getting this done and out of the way so I can get a nap in. Happy Christmas Eve, Underground Citizens. I have to be in the Choir Room at 9:30 P.M. tonight. No, I am NOT spending Christmas Eve with the family this year--I'm too tired, too irritated and sleep-deprived. And if I have to go to Christmas Dinner with the family tonight, someone's gonna get yelled at by a rather irked me. And 'irked' is putting that nicely. I'm sorry but... no. Not this year. This isn't the year to subject myself to extra stress on top of the hell and high water I've already dealt with so far. In fact, I think I've been saying "Bah humbug" more than "Happy Christmas" this year--far more. That's a first--it's also pretty scary too.

Sooo, that said, here's a Thursday Tradition filled with YouTubes of music, fun and holiday cheer. Turn up the tune'age. And raise a cup of cheer for me--or at least, try to anyway, if you're as bleah as me.

"Wonderful Christmastime" - Paul McCartney
*Old-School Alternation Song of the Week*


"The Chanukah Song" - Adam Sandler
*Dedicated to my Jewish second family. Much love + respect!*


"Santa Claus Is Coming to Town" - Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band
*Favorite version of the Christmas classic*


"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" - James Taylor
*Christmas Anthem 2008 + Song of the Week*
*Dedicated to family and friends within the Underground, with love*


"Oi! to the World!" - The Vandals
*Christmas Anthem 2007*
*No Doubt did a fantabulous cover of this tune!*


"Christmas Wrapping" - The Waitresses
*Christmas Anthem 2009*


Merry Christmas, with lots of love. Make the best of it, even in face of the worst of it.

~ me

Chapter 228 ~ Some Christmas Lullaby...

Not very much of an update but, Friday's Hanukkah Party at the Synagogue was quite wonderful. Everyone was very surprised and excited to see me. 'Uncle' Reuven even did the one Kiddush which involves me cheering "L'Chayim!!!"--which was a realisation to those I hadn't greeted before that that, I was back where I was missed. It was a wonderful party, and I can't wait for this Friday, which is the 8th and final Night of Hanukkah. Looks to be most promising and most exciting. It also means, MORE LATKES!!!

Also, today was the Christmas Party with the Choir. Needless to say, the party didn't last long enough--we didn't get to have a sing-along. BUT, I -did- get to play the piano for a bit, and practice for Christmas morning when I'll be playing the Carillon for Susan [who'll be in Chicago to greet her new grandchild this Christmas]. I even got to change before going to the Party, as I decided it was better to dress up for the occasion than to just be a bit on the 'punky' side. All in all it was a lovely Party, and I can't wait for next year's party already. But, alas, another year to go. Still, it was wonderful; perhaps next year, if someone does play the piano and a sing-along ensues, maybe I will get up the nerve to ask my dear Choirmaster for a dance. Not like I would--I'm socially bipolar. I'm such a shy brat. It's almost pathetic. But, still. Who knows...

*sigh* Alas, bedtime already. Long day at work tomorrow, including a Christmas Party at 4 P.M. This could be a very exhausting day...

Dreaming of Dreidles and Friends, New Memories, Music and a Choirmaster...

~ me

Chapter 227 ~ MAAAYDAAAY!!!

Ah yes, the holiday season. Filled with lights and Christmas trees. Latkes and Hanukkah menorahs [or Hanukyahs, I think that's the way it's spelt. if not, my bad!]. Family time and party time. Lots of music, lots of headaches. Lots of this, that and the other. And enough drama to make me [or you if this is the case] scream--deep breath, all together now,

BAH FRECKIN' HUMBUG!!!

*sigh* There. All better. As long as the neighbors don't ask, "Holy cow what happened to the girl!?" then, hey. All is well. Because it's been that kind of week. Allow me to throw a few verbal snowballs on a few itty bitty little matters.

First and foremost, my extremely evil laptop. It's been uncooperative. And it's been acting up, for a lack of better words. In fact, I think I've pleaded with it quite enough. [Of course, I could be wrong!!] But, while it's being very nice to me *now* I figured, update the Trans-Underground Express while absofreckin'lutely possible. Sooo... yeah. I really wish it didn't have to be a rant-o-rama. Don't worry, I'll make up for it with some good news. But, in order to get to the good stuff, I need to let out the bad stuff too. 'Cause, those of y'all who've read the blog long enough... yeah. We don't need Sunny holding her temper all in. Nuh-uh.

There. That said, on to a more severely irksome topic. Everyone -knows- this one. Work. Yep, the drive-thru of doom as I like to call it. And these days--I hate to admit it but--it's been hell in a handbasket. Between the weather as of recent [wind + rain + cold = ick] and the technology failure as a result of a power surge late Tuesday night, today... at work... eh... yeah. Bad. Very, very bad. There is only one old-school credit card machine in the entire store... and it's in the Back Drive-thru of all places. Which means there's myself, Joey [Mary, the espresso-machine queen--NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH STORE MANAGER MARY... alias Blue Sky] taking the orders... and up to all three Front Counter order takers, in the event that all four of us, at some point, have to take a credit card. Two rolls of receipt paper got changed out, the New System finally got fixed around 1 P.M. earlier today... around the time I was leaving. Irony, anyone?

And lastly on the not-so-good list of random thoughts... well, it's still taking a while for me to snap out of that November slump. Yes, 10 days into December and I still haven't entirely snapped back into yet. I think it's partly because of the weather. One friend reasoned it had to do with my first Christmas being single in a few years [gee thanks... rub it in why not. lol]. Another thought I was overstressed [eh, maybe...? i don't know...!!]. And one other person thought, "Oh, we all go through that, Jenn. Don't worry about it." Uhm, problem is, with me, 9 times out of 10 you -don't- want to tell me not to worry about it because, chances are, I'm SOOO gonna worry about it!! But, back to this. Yeah... part of me is still kinda... uhm... blah. That's it. Blah.

Alright!! now that I've got the bad stuff out of the system, on to the good stuff. Like, a Christmas tree, perhaps! [And I still need to get a pic of the Christmas tree at work posted up here at some point!] The tree [finally] got trimmed and adorned during Kids Night on Tuesday 1 December. The kids made the majority of the ornaments that are up on the tree. I only made a few and had to momentarily get over my fears of heights AND falling to get the Star at the top. All in all, best Kids Night in a while. But if you want insanity, this past Kids Night was that--especially after I decided to extend it. Because, let's face it. It's just downright WRONG to interrupt kids in their Christmas-card-making projects. So, I extended it, ended up with glitter glue all over my shirt [thankfully it was a Super Mario shirt... 'cause I would really hate to have to end up with glitter glue all over my work shirt, which was *almost* the case!], helped kids make cards, and even painted faces of a high school girls basketball team from Flagler County. Alll in all, hilarity ensued. Fun times. Though by the time all was said and done it was 10 P.M. and, I really needed to get home, post-haste... who knew that half an hour later after I left would be the power surge noted earlier during the rants?

Also, this past Saturday was DeLand's annual Christmas Parade. Yours truly walked it... with Rabbit... Blue Sky... some coworkers... and RONALD McDONALD! Yep, Ronald was with us again this year. This time around, before the Parade started, we had time to get pics taken with Ronald, as well as the City of Deltona's Grinch [or at least I did anyway]. We had lots of fun catching up with friends, coworkers, some of our resident higher-ups [one of the Supervisors, and the Store Owners both, were there]. And there was even a dose of danger and adventure because, as we were heading back in the opposite direction, to catch the rest of the Parade, three of my coworkers went to Checkers--I stayed across the street from there. Surprise, surprise--not five minutes later did a fight break out. Cops and the Sheriff got involved. It was exciting--and pretty freckin' scary--to watch from across the street. The Parade was halted momentarily while the scuffle got stopped, and then it [the Parade] was resumed. All in all, eh, not a bad Parade this year but, I'm now concerned about its possible turn-out for next year. We'll just have to wait and see what-all happens next year.

And, lastly, PARTY!!! Yep, three parties in four days. And what looks to be next week's schedule too. Anyone taking notes?

+ Friday 11 December [tomorrow] ~ Work [5 a.m.-1 p.m.] - Hanukkah Party at Temple Israel [night 1 of Hanukkah]
+ Saturday 12 December ~ Work [5 a.m.-1 p.m.]
+ Sunday 13 December ~ Choir Christmas Party [after the 11 a.m. service]
+ Monday 14 December ~ Work [5 a.m.-1 p.m.] - Christmas Potluck Party at work [starting at 11 a.m.]
+ Tuesday 15 December ~ Work [12-8 p.m.] - Kids Night at work [5-8 p.m.]
+ Wednesday 16 December ~ OFF!!! [i can breathe for once! lol] - F.A.M. Night on Christmas Break until January 2010
+ Thursday 17 December ~ Work [5 a.m.-1 p.m.] - Daughters of the King meeting [7-8 p.m.]
+ Friday 18 December ~ Work [5 a.m.-1 p.m.] - Hanukkah Party at Temple Israel [night 8 (final night) of Hanukkah]
+ Saturday 20 December ~ Work [5 a.m.-1 p.m.]

WHEW!!! that's gonna be a long week... which, mind, the work schedule is ALWAYS subject to change. If that is the case I will update accordingly. But, anywho... I can but only try to make the best of it. Who knows, maybe I'll do something during Kids Night for Hanukkah... or not. I don't know. If we can get away with Christmas then, why not Hanukkah? I'm sure we can try to make latkes out of French Fries...

--erm, or not?

I suppose that is all for now. I know I haven't been updating on the musicality that is the Thursday Tradition but, as of lately, the laptop's been hating on me. And I'd been too busy, too hectic, and too "WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" to even get my nerves together proper. Sooo, hopefully, I should be able to get some music back up soon. Maybe Adam Sandler's "Hanukkah Song" for the Thursday Tradition next week? Sound good with y'all? 'Cause it does for me... I mean, it's Hanukkah after all! And it's a funny song. And... and... it's one of the few great mainstream Hanukkah songs that can get away with mainstream radio. How's that for made-of-awesome?

And on THAT bombshell... time to get ready for my D.O.K. meeting. I'm already late for the shower. Dang nabbit.

Bracing for what promises to be one very long Holiday season...

~ me

Chapter 226 ~ Goodbye, November

So, alas, another year, and you come and leave me now, November. And bringing with you, were an inspection on week one. Insomnia and misery on week two. Three funerals on week three. A long week of exhausting misery last week. Yesterday you brought a missed moment in being in the Christmas picture. Tonight... you bring back heartache, reminding me of just how truly alone I am, how truly alone I will always be. I hate you... I HATE YOU!

Eleven years ago, you began an almost-six-year fight that would've, should've left me dead. I should not be here. I should not be alive. I should not be existing. Don't tell me otherwise--because you, November, are a liar. I cannot, will not, ever believe you--because I have made that mistake before. And I have been sorely mistaken. I have learned my lesson. And I will never find hope in you, ever again.

You brought me another month of misery. Right now, I miss my Sissy. I miss a few people in my uncommon existence. I am scared that I might truly end up alone... I'm 26 years old... that should be the last thing on my worries, but it's not. All I can think of is, how the hell did I end up so alone, sick to my stomach in misery and wanting to tear myself apart? If I am invited to eat, I don't want to eat, but I eat or else I risk starving myself to death. This pain... while much of it is not my own... the pain I'm feeling right now... I feel so... so...

empty.

That's all that seems to be remaining of me now. Emptiness. A hollow shell. And a dull, aching pain of a headache, of all the tears I've cried this month. I should've cried enough to make a river to drown in. Yes, I feel that empty inside. And there is nothing that you or anyone can do to make me say or feel otherwise. Not tonight. Not now.

So this is my farewell letter to another you, November, as you die and go away for another year. Thank you for leaving me hollow, empty, miserable. As I had always been around this time of year. Thank you for making me look forward to Christmas... in a way that, I won't be looking forward to it this year. Thank you for lying to me, telling me this year would be better than the last. Thank you for convincing me that I belonged, that I was meant to exist, that I was loved... thank you for lying to me, and making me believe it.

November, I hate you. Goodbye.

~ me



*Song of the Week*
"Cast No Shadow" [UNKLE Beachhead Remix] - Oasis

Note to those reading via Facebook: the video is posted on my Wall.*

Chapter 225 ~ The Gloomy

I hate November. It's the one month of the year I get depressed the most. And it's usually at its worst for the year. I've already pissed off a good handful of people because the stress level went into overload; I can't really get enthusiastic about stuff because I'm afraid something's going to horrendously wrong. And I don't really feel at my most creative... if anything, it's a much darker mood. I don't know...

Part of it has to do with three people that the Daughters and I have been praying for, for a while, who've passed away this week. One of them, Mary Helen, was one of the original Daughters within the Chapter. So, at the moment, I'm kind of in mourning for those three until the last Funeral, which is for Mary Helen, on Thursday afternoon. As a result, there will be NO Thusday Tradition this Thursday upcoming, as I will be attending the Funeral.

Meanwhile, I haven't really had the chance to catch up with Latin-O and see how plans for next Saturday are looking. And, to be honest, I should probably do that, and soon too. Like, now even. I am still hoping for the best, that we will get to hang out again.

Right now... I just feel like... bleah...

~ me

The Thursday Tradition #...?

Yes. I lost count. BUT, it's gonna be an interesting Thursday Tradition, because for the first Tradition in months, it's a good ol' slew of YouTubes. But, trust me. It's all good.

First and foremost, here's a bit of a surprise from Newsweek. And while it doesn't touch on everything, it *does* touch on some of the most memorable stuff that went down in the last decade. Yes, it's almost 2010 already. That said...
The Decade in 7 Minutes - Newsweek


Next up, ah yes. One of those pop-ish, overplayed songs. But you know what? I love it. It was my Song of the Week for last week [despite a 6-day workweek and major temper tantrum from hell]. I find myself singing along to it at work. Yes, don't lie--it's addictive.
Boom Boom Pow - Black Eyed Peas


From the heart of the Indie Intelligence files, an all-but-forgotten favorite song of mine. And, in fact, it's what I'm considering as my Classic Indie Intelligence Song of the Year for 2009, which I will be doing sometime next month for the final Thursday Tradition of this year--and so much as this DECADE! That said, from the year 1994, a 15-year-old gem,
Skull - Sebadoh


And digging deeper into the Indie Intelligence files, a brand-spankin'-new addition. One of many, actually. But, here's a really interesting one, particularly as the song came out in 1978. Fair warning--it is DEFINITELY not of the usualities within the Indie Intelligence files. All the more reason it BELONGS in the I2 files! All I can say now is, you. have. been. warned!
Warm Leatherette - The Normal


Surfacing somewhere slightly closer to the usualities of the I2 files, is a song that has also been a favorite. Well, more like a favorite of the I2 files' usualities. Great song all in all. Grand classic.
Love My Way - The Psychedlic Furs


Once again, this song surfaces for the first time in about a month or so. And it's a nomination for Anthem of the Year for this year for me. We all know this tune... LOL! And, yes, this -is- the video for it. Sing along, you Underground loons...
Stand or Fall - The Fixx


Now, sing-along done, get your ass up and dance. Yes, y'all read proper. Because this is another new addition to the I2 files--and THIS one, y'all didn't see coming. In fact, this was [and SO is] the anthem to Halloween 2009. And to think this was old-school freestyle musique!! Now, that said, GET YOUR ASS UP AND DANCE!!
Don't Stop the Rock - FreeStyle


And, to close it all up, is the Song of the Week. I *love* this song. And at this point, the lyrics speak up enough for me, especially the chorus. The song is awesomeness. And it's my
*Song of the Week* This and That - Michael Penn


We will return to your regularly-scheduled madness tomorrow. I promise.

Raisin' the noise, raisin' the roof...

~ me

Chapter 224 ~ Change of Heart

So much has gone on... so much...

For one, today I have decided to say an almost-bitter "Goodbye" without even saying it, to Yuuki. As I haven't really been able to speak with him at all since that last IM almost two weeks ago, and as I am afraid he has moved to New York and--possibly--begun to go on with his life... yeah. I have feared a bit of the worse, and while it's only been about a month since I'd met him, sadly the time arrives to say farewell and move on. Of course it pains me a bit inside, because, hey! I actually liked Yuuki. But, I guess, life dealt us a cold hand. And I have to come to accept it--and, tough to admit it but, I have.

On the other hand, I have found myself wanting to spend more time with Latin-O, and partly because of the kiss from All Hallow's Weekend. While I don't necessarily see myself as betraying anyone whatsoever--remember, Yuuki and Latin-O are [or were?] friends--I wonder if I have to really take up Yuuki's advice to "find someone who can be there." It's not going to be easy but... who knows? And what does Latin-O see in me? I guess it's probably more than I'd realised. However, I don't want to jump the gun on anything. So, here's hoping that maybe, after some three or four years of being friends, maybe there might be something there that wasn't there before. I don't know... we will see.

Last week I survived a very long workweek, complete with an Inspection--which I survived on some five hours' sleep. By the way, we passed. Still though, the week had a way of messing me up and over, especially with my sleeping patterns. Yeah, it was a rough week last week. This week however, my schedule's back to normal so I have my Wednesday off. And that means, more lost sleep to catch up on. More sleep is a good thing, especially since I'd lost enough sleep last week and had to make up for it and, thus, missing Discipleship class AND Services on last Wednesday and this past Sunday. I owe my team plenty. *sigh*

So... that was pretty much last week in a nutshell. I still have much to do before I try to finalise plans with Latin-O for Saturday 21 November, to hang out with him again. Hopefully, well, things go through somehow. *fingers crossed*

Wishing... wondering...
[hoping... and moving on...]

~ me